Ok, yeah I know, it’s been a while. Let’s just say I’ve had a lot going on, and I’ll get to that. But forst I need to tell you abou the end of our Holt experience.
Lillie asked the bad Holt lady about reunion when adoptees became adults. that is to say what she meant, it took a few tries for the Bad Holt Lady to quite get what she was saying. first, we found out that it was completely wrong, as well as impossible for children to be reunited. Duh, we get that part. I’m not sure it had ever occured to Bad Holt Lady that adoptees actually grow up.
When Lillie really pinned her down and asked the Bad Holt Lady, very slowly and and using very small words, what she thought of adult adoptees reuniting with their firstparents she said something like, “Well that would be up to the parties involved…if both parties thought it was alright, I suppose it wouldn’t hurt..” Bad Holt Lady looked very confused at this point. And by both parties she meant both sets of parents, it seems that the adult adoptee should have nothing to say about this.
When pressed harder she thought it would be OK if “both parties were stable.” By this she did mean the first parent and adoptee. I found it a bit odd that she would even think that any All American perfectly adjusted adoptee would have any chance of not being stable, I guess the Bad Holt Lady missed that contradiction too.
Take what you want to from what I’ve written about this experience. It is presented as it actually happened.

18 comments
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October 23, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Coco
First of all, I’ve missed you, and yeah, I know it’s because I bailed for a while myself.
Secondly, the Bad Holt Lady creeps me out big time. Want to scare me this Halloween? Come dressed as the Bad Holt Lady. I’ll run screaming like a howler monkey.
October 23, 2008 at 4:25 pm
paragraphein
Yippee!!!! Was waiting for the last installment of this.
The Bad Hold Lady makes me shudder.
October 23, 2008 at 4:25 pm
paragraphein
Errr…. Bad HolT Lady.
October 23, 2008 at 4:33 pm
Theresa
I’d say Bad Hold applies too.
Soooo grateful for the final installment
October 23, 2008 at 6:39 pm
addiepray
Coco,
It’s so good to hear from you. Let’s not lose each other again.
And you better watch out on Halloween.
para, yes Bad Hold Lady works too.
Theresa,
Grateful? You?
October 23, 2008 at 10:14 pm
dory
OMG Coco – you’ve given me the best idea for a costume!!!! I need to run out and buy a bunch of baby dolls and some monopoly money – bwahahahaha.
October 23, 2008 at 10:20 pm
joyjoy
Oh I want to come hang out with you on Halloween to see your costume Dory.
Holt is absolute sleaze.
October 23, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Elizabeth
You and Lillie rock!
October 23, 2008 at 10:55 pm
Coco
Dory, if you do dress up as BHL I want some pictures. Classic!
Addie, I love on you.
October 24, 2008 at 1:37 am
Mei-Ling
“first, we found out that it was completely wrong, as well as impossible for children to be reunited.”
Funny. Very funny.
I beat that obstacle two years ago and don’t have the conscience of murder on my hands or anything horrendous like that.
I mean, what was I thinking? Wanting to reuniite with DNA-related strangers? We all know how “dangerous” reunited adoptees are!
Ha. Ha.
(Impossible for adult adoptees to be reunited? Is this lady NOT aware that many adult adoptees are being reunited or have BEEN reunited as we speak?)
October 24, 2008 at 9:42 am
dasmondhaschen
I ask, in all honesty, what the problem is with Holt?
They were very helpful to me when I inquired about finding my birth parents (whom I have no real interest in meeting, I was just curious).
I didn’t encounter anything like the situation you described above, which is pretty much crap, I agree.
October 24, 2008 at 2:37 pm
addiepray
What’s wrong with Holt?
Well this,
http://adoptionsurvivor.wordpress.com/
among other things.
Lots of other things.
Stay tuned.
October 24, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Advocate for ethical adoptions
I pity you. Not because you were adopted but because you obviously have issuses that go way deeper.
Get therapy, not a blog.
October 24, 2008 at 5:38 pm
Mei-Ling
Advocate: Why would you “pity” Addie?
I was under the impression that she merely wishes adoption could be more ethical. It’s not like she thinks it’s the road to hell or that all adoptive parents are evil or anything like that.
October 24, 2008 at 5:57 pm
addiepray
Froggy BeeI mean Advocate..What the hell would my issues have to do with what The Bad Holt Lady told me?
I have simply recounted an experience here. One that pushes the limits of ethical adoption.
October 25, 2008 at 12:17 am
Elizabeth
Hey advocate there are no ethical adoptions. Do you believe in the tooth fairy as well?
Oh, and get bent.
October 26, 2008 at 4:26 pm
kimette
I was waiting for this final episod. Thank you Addie!
“…impossible for children to be reunited”.
Despite their evil action to prevent me from finding my family (that had never given their consent for adoption), I have been reunited with them.
October 27, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Kippa
Could it be that Bad Holt Lady was taken aback and being *deliberately* obtuse, though in an ill-prepared way?
Or was she really only credulous and dumb?
Sometimes people just refuse to know what they know – you know?