Spotaneous Record Combustion

Why is it that adoptees records always seem to catch on fire? The phenomenon disturbs me deeply.

I don’t know how many times an adoptee has told me that someone has told them that their records burned. In fact it happens so often, I wonder if we a dealing with some type of recurring event.

I was told my own records burned. A very nice lady told me that the hospital I was born in had burned to the ground in 1968. The thing is, I don’t live that far from that hospital, I had driven by it many times. It appeared to me to have been standing for at least fifty years. Never the less, I searched newspaper records and didn’t find a thing. I saw reports of a couple of house and barn fires in my birthplace that year, but not the hospital.

Considering I was born a town of about 2000 people, one would think that a hospital fire would be a big event. I know in my own little town it was news for weeks when a cigarette left in a stack of Styrofoam cups ignited the Gas And Grub convenience store, it made the TV news and everything. But small town newspapers are more known for wedding announcements and high school sports scores than hard edge reporting, So called up the local library and asked the lady who answered the phone if there had been a fire at the hospital.

She had been born in the same hospital as me, and was about ten years older, she didn’t recall a fire. Her Uncle had been the Volunteer Fire Dept. cheif during the 60’s and 70’s and she promised to ask him for me. I called her back the next week, he didn’t know about any fire at the hospital. He had, in great detail, described a fire in a hatchery that happened about that time, but we agreed that probably wasn’t helpful.

I called the nice lady at the hospital back. Under questioning she revealed it wasn’t the WHOLE hospital, just the records room. Well maybe not the WHOLE records room, just a cabinet. Maybe it was just the birth records. She reallty wasn’t sure.

This would be almost amusing, if I were the only one, but I’m not. Not by a long shot. I can only conclude that something else is at work here. As we all know, none of these people would lie, and may, in fact, be in danger if they handle this records regularly. Imagine if your job involved working with object that appear completely safe, but had potential to spontaneously burst into flame at any moment. Wouldn’t you want to know?

The people that work at hospitals, adoption agencies, and State departments of health, need to be warned. They could so easily be disfigured or even killed by burning adoption records. There needs to be some type of safety procedure put into place. At the very least all adoption records should bear a sticker warning the handler that they are flammable.

If the government was aware of this potential danger to it’s employees, I have no doubt that they would take quick action.

That is why I ask you to alert your state and local authorities of this danger, immediately. Ask them how many more people need to be hurt by incendiary adoption records.


22 thoughts on “Spotaneous Record Combustion

  1. Trying not to laugh….gee do you think this happens to records in Doctors offices too? Hmmm…

    Almost as suspicious as the constantly recurring fires in the churches of Quebec where all the adoption records and birth certificates for that province are stored.

    Must remember to call worker’s comp. and warn them about the danger.

  2. Yes Aurelia, we must get the word out.

    I believe we will begin to find that this is an international problem. Not just Canada, but as international adoption increases, everywhere in the world. I do think it’s going to take a few years to show up, there are very few cases of records less than 18 years-old combusting.

  3. It’s time for the Captain Obvious Free E-Margarita Trivia Quiz!

    Today, let’s identify the Very fitting Movie Quote

    The first to identify the which movie this quote comes from wins a yearly supply of Free E-Margaritas!

    Here We Go:

    “You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?”

    Hint: This character kills someone with a ballpoint pen in this movie.

  4. Joe Pesci as Tommy DeVito in Goodfellows.

    Hey Addie – are you sure you weren’t born in the hatchery and your parents just didn’t tell you to spare you more shame?

  5. Dory is our winner!

    Yes, Dory you will win absolutely free of charged all the e-margaritas you can drink for a whole year!


    And remember since they are e-margaritas, they contain e-alcohol, so you have as many as you want.

    Special Thanks to Captain Obvious for donating the prize!

  6. Mmmmm, I prefer American Spirit – you know, healthy smoking – but beggars can’t be choosers – unless your an AP – OMG – I didn’t just say that did I? My bad. Oh if only I were wearing e-maternity – nope, I’m full blown egg shaped right now.

  7. I didn’t get a fire story. Instead I was told, “Adoption records? No one has EVER asked for those before! I’m not sure if we can give them out!”

    Um yeah right.

  8. When I lived in Illinois and had friends who were trying to get their records, more than a few of those got “they were destroyed in a flood” stories. So not only do the records cause fires, they have the power to cause the waters of Lake Michigan to seek them out too. I’m extremely concerned for file clerks across the country.

  9. mmmmmm – my hospital ‘closed down’ and all records were sent to another hospital.
    Haven’t had the energy to hunt that hospital down.
    Perhaps the damn hospital has gone and grown legs – I could end up chasing the damn thing all over bloody Sydney.
    Another great post Miss Addie!!
    Hugs, Possum. (formally known as Chez!!!)

  10. whoops – forgot to change my name in the “name” bit.
    Having a bit of a blonde day here. LOL
    Chez will now be forever known as Possum!!
    (I think I need one of those e-margaritas!!)

  11. LMAO over here.

    No locusts but I do believe a group of nuns gone wild (have you seen the movie?) drown my records in a vat of holy e-margaritas. It sounds suspicious but who am I to question? Since I can’t tell you who I am …..I cannot question.

    Here’s one:

  12. Eric “damn right I want cheesy-poofs” Cartman

    Southpark, CO

    I think I’m glad I haven’t seen “Nuns Gone Wild” . I made the mistake of going down to Cancun during Holy Spring Break once. Those are some crazy ladies.

  13. My adoption agency really DID have a fire. This is from their website history page:
    The year 1979 also brought one of Family & Children’s Center’s greatest challenges. In September of that year, fire destroyed the main building, a local landmark remembered by area residents to this day. Undaunted, the board, leadership and staff of Family & Children’s Center planned, financed and built a new central services building on the site, which today continues to serve as Family & Children’s Center’s headquarters.
    Luckily, it seems my records were safe.
    They did leave out the part on their history page where in the eighties they killed a kid while “restraining” him. Ooops.

  14. It is an international problem. Apparently, there were spontaneous combustions in Korea as well.

    Too bad that X-Files went off the air–that woulda been one hell of a show!

  15. Mine were eatin by Locusts.
    No, but I was told mine were destroyed, I am a natural mother and I guess they figured I would never need them as I prolly just “went on with my life and forgot all about it”

    Lucky for me though I got my hospital records, even those after a few years are “destroyed” i requested mine a few years before my time was up on that.

    I think we all are intitled to any of that stuff and that they by law should have a longer time frame for holding on and storing them becasue of the nature of it all.

  16. I’m not a bit surprised that this has happened in Korea. It’s a problem world wide.

    Something must be done.


    Quick action is the key. There hasn’t been a single instance of these records combusting while in the hands of a first mother or adoptee.


    Gee, it’s just one kid, how are supposed to remember EVERYTHING?

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