“Don’t know why people think they have to be heard.”
-some dumbass on a perspective adoptive parents blog in response to a few gentle, yet realistic, comments.
It seems that this guy has made up his mind on the subject of adoption and everything else. Good for him, it’s nice to know where you stand. But why do they think they’ve made up everybody’s minds about everything?
I don’t think I can think of one person that I agree with on everything. Lots of people share my interests, causes, opinions, sense of humor, and my time. None of them share all of those things, even the people closest to me. That’s alright with me. I think some differences make things much more interesting.
I also have a lot in common with some folks who I disagree with on major issues. I’m throwing a bridal shower tomorrow for one of the most dedicated Republicans I know. We’ll never agree on politics, and we’ve had some spirited discussions on the subject, but we’ve both found a lot of things to like about each other.
In the adoption world I have many friends that I don’t see eye to eye with on every aspect. I have to admit that I sometimes cringe at some of the things they say. I won’t say I haven’t said some things that made them cringe. But if they will listen to me, I’ll listen to them.
Without allowing yourself to hear what others have to say, it’s too easy to become convinced that you are absolutely right in everything. That can be a harmful place to be, harmful more to yourself than others.
One’s convictions should be tested from time to time. It keeps them strong. Any belief worth having should be able to stand up to opposition.
I wonder about folks who don’t believe that they can even hear opposing views. Do they just feel that they don’t have time for it? Are they frustrated that they can’t change others feelings by their presence? Are they afraid they might change their mind? Do they just not want to see those in opposition as people like they are?
I don’t know. I guess I’ll never find out. That’s OK, I have lots of friends.