Ward Of The State (Slight Return)

Due to my recent employment situation, I am again dependent on the state.

It’s triggering.

As an adult adoptee most of my contact with the state has been adversarial.  I want my original birth certificate and they refuse to give it to me.  This because they think of me as a child that cannot understand my position.

The fact is, I understand my position very well.  Obtaining my OBC will not change a thing about who I am or what has happened to me, but it will make me feel like an adult.  It’s simple, but they won’t help me.  I’m  supposed to be fine with all that.

The state does  feel that I might need some help with my joblessness.  It’s been explained to me that losing a job can be very traumatic.

I get that.

The state has told me that’s it’s unfair and I shouldn’t be able to understand my situation.

I think I have a pretty good grasp on the situation, actually.

They tell me that I may feel like my identity has been taken away.

Um no.  I know what that feels like and this isn’t it.

They say this could be the most significant transition in my life.

Trust me, it’s so not.

They want me to know if I start to feel out of control or that I fear I might hurt myself, counseling is available.

Oh where have you been all of my life?

They even offered to set up a “rap session” for us to dicuss what we are going through.

No, in the name of all things holy, no.

I’m not trying to minimize  job loss here, it is hard, but it’s not like the end of my world.

Honestly I’m offended that they take unemployment so much more seriously than adoption.  I lost a job here, not my biological roots, not my name, not my identity.  I’m supposed to be just fine with being adopted and not require any kind of assistance dealing with it, but lose my job, and it’s time for intensive intervention.

What the hell ever.


6 thoughts on “Ward Of The State (Slight Return)

  1. Right on. I’ve been unemployed for over a year. Unemployment is about to run out with no extension in sight from congress. I’m also an adoptee who is not allowed access to her OBC either. Right on. Right on.

  2. this is one of those times when I want to pump my fist in the air and shout, “fuckin’ A Man!”

    but I don’t as that would be ummm, unbecoming of a lady. :shifty:

  3. AMEN!!!!!! AMEN!!!! AMEN!!!!!

    I am a mother who surrendered a child in 1970. Never once….ONCE, have I been asked or offered any kind of assistance to deal with the loss of my little girl…….from anyone. Agency, parents, the state, the hospital, the court…no one.

    I learned three years ago that I have suffered from post traumatic stress for nearly 40 years…….

    Children’s Home Society “held my hand” as they scooped up my newborn little girl…….AND, they “held our hand” when the day came to help us reunite……..but when I asked for assistance to find therapy, education, articles, SOMETHING to keep me from going out of my frikkin’ mind…….


  4. Pingback: Grown In My Heart » Blog Archive » Adoption Carnival: Your Favorite Posts

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